From being a daughter to a mom.......................

Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone




Having a baby is one of the most magical moments of your life. It practically turns your world upside down.

Not long ago I was a kid myself and its seems so unreal that today I am carrying a whole new person inside of me. Life takes a complete 360 degrees turn the moment you decide to add another human being into your life and being responsible for the kind of person he turns out to be. I just hope and pray that I turn out to be even 50% of what my mom is as a mom.

Words are just not enough to describe what I feel right now. It seems like I was born to be a mom. The bond one feels with this little person who you haven't even seen (except for couple of ultrasounds) is just undescribable. The reality of being pregnant sets in when you feel the baby move for the first time. Now I have somewhat learned what my mom felt when we were late from school, work or for the matter of fact from anywhere else. I feel almost the same anxiety if I don't feel my baby move for even couple of hours.
Its such a heart wrenching feeling when you realize what you did to your mom's heart whenever you did something she did not want you to do. You can't understand the pain of another person unless you go through it.

My life has changed so much. These days when me and my husband, Anand go for shopping and he asks me to get something for myself , I just don't feel like it. I want to save everything for my baby and get everything for him. The only thing that bothers me is being away from my family so far away. I want my child to know everyone in the family beyond us and instill those family values that our parents gave us. My father in law gets upset sometimes just by the thought of not being able to see his grandchild right after he will be born and it rips my heart too. I hope we will be able to visit them soon after this little one is born.

I just want to relive my childhood through my child and I know it will be difficult if its a boy. Anand already has certain plans for the baby if its a boy. He wants to train him in martial arts and get trained along with him. I still remember his expression when I told him that he was going to be a dad, he just did not know to cry or to laugh.

I just can't wait for this little guy to come into this world and brighten everything around us. As Bill Cosby once said - Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.